I have been angry, frustrated, and grieved by the story of George Floyd and countless other similar stories through the years. While I have been angry, I have also been silent. Why? Well, as a middle aged white man….
I am concerned about being insensitive. I am worried I might say something or imply something that is offensive. In a moment of tragedy and anger this is the last thing I want to do. I am truly grieved but I’m not sure what to say and I ‘m not sure how to say it.
I do not want to create an unfair sense of shared experience. I want to grieve with those who grieve but I have no idea what it is like to experience racism. Honestly, when I read the anger of the white community, it lands in an odd way for me. It feels like they are sharing in an experience they have no right to share in. There is a balance between grief and sharing in the experience that I want to find.
I suspect there is more racism in me then I care to admit. I do not think I am overtly racist or intentionally racist, but when I examine my heart there are biases and a sense of privilege lodged in me that colors the way I see the world.
So, I have said very little.
I have sinned.
I think you can make a strong case that silence can be a sin. I think you can make a strong case that silence is the original sin. In Genesis 3 when Eve is getting ready to eat the fruit that God told her and Adam not to eat, she took some and gave it to her husband who was with her. Adam is there. He is quiet and disengaged. The sin of silence.
In James 4:17 we read, “If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn’t do it, it is sin for them.” The sin of doing nothing.
Honestly, I am still processing what I should do.
I will say this…. quiet does not sit right with me anymore.
Quiet invites racism into our communities.
Quiet invites injustice into our streets.
Quiet invites inequality into the socioeconomic structures of our city.
Perhaps repentance of my quiet is the best place to start.
Encourage, Challenge, and Equip 